Jealousy. For many of us who have finished school and are now at work, we think jealousy is so High School. For some men, being jealous is a girl thing. Still for others, it’s for immature people. As for me, I look at jealousy so much differently after attending one Bible Study 3 years ago.
It happens in any relationship right? Insecurity can take over and then trust begins to lose it’s grip. Ever happened to you before? Thought so. Just how do you overcome insecurity when you’re courting someone or when you’re being courted?
In order to battle the lies of insecurity, you have to develop yourself. You have to know that you are able to handle a relationship not just in the mind but in your heart and attitude, in your finances, in your physical fitness, in every aspect of your life! When you have developed yourself as a person, (and I should say, as a Christian – in your relationship with God) then there can be no more room for the lies of insecurity to take over your mind.
I’m going to be blunt and painfully honest with you. Just think for a second: Would you be insecure with other guys who are courting her when you know you’re the better choice? I rest my case. Likewise with girls, would you be insecure with other girls around him when you know that you’re the better option?
And when you’ve been overlooked, would you have any regrets knowing that you’re the best you can be? All you can do is make the other person realize that you were the best of yourself during the time. Make sure that it won’t be your loss when you’re not the one chosen. After all, it’s God who will do the matchmaking but it’s you who will have the choice to make about who would have lost more between you and the other person.
Affirm yourself with the truth
Often we look for affirmation from people – which is important, but we also have to look for our affirmation from ourselves and from God. Know the truth because the truth will affirm you. You have to immerse yourself with His word – that you are His child and that He will help you grow if only you depend on Him and focus on Him. You can only get your real affirmation from God. People’s affirmation come and go, they say yes and no and often times we’re left confused. Affirmation from ourselves can vary and be influenced by what people say and by what you’re going through in life. But God’s affirmation will ALWAYS REMAIN THE SAME.
God will tell you how much you’re worth in His eyes. And it is important to know that before you start a relationship with anyone else –especially a romantic relationship with the opposite sex.
Don’t look at your status with the other person
There will always be times when we ask the other person what our status is. Are we on the same page? Are we scoring more points than the other competitors? But that’s not the point! Don’t look at your status with the other person because in the end, it won’t really matter! Look at your status with God.
What does God say about you? Are you good to go? How do we know our status with God? Through His word. It’s all laid out there – you just have to read it. Pursuing someone (I’m talking from a guy’s point of view because hey, I’m a guy) isn’t about the score – it’s about relationship. And if your relationship with God – who is all-loving, is not good, how much more do you think can you fare with a finite person who’s ability to love is limited by his or her humanity?
Looking at the score can only make you proud or make you miserable. Focus on your relationship with God and you’ll know if you are well-worth it and if you’re ready for a relationship.