Jealousy. For many of us who have finished school and are now at work, we think jealousy is so High School. For some men, being jealous is a girl thing. Still for others, it’s for immature people. As for me, I look at jealousy so much differently after attending one Bible Study 3 years ago.
Have you ever been annoyed by someone who has done nothing wrong to you?
Have you ever had that feeling of not wanting to associate yourself with someone but there is no apparent reason as to WHY?
That my friend, is jealousy. Sadly, it’s not just for women and does not die after high school.
This article is for men and women out there who have avoided a number of people because of “not knowing why”. It is also for brothers and sisters in Christ to remember that God is never pleased when jealousy creeps in your relationships. And more so, this article speaks to remind WHAT WE SHOULD DO when we are humble enough to ADMIT that we are jealous.
Jealousy as wikipedia defines is: “an emotion that refers to negative feelings towards someone“. It pertains to feelings such as insecurity, fear and anxiety. And because we are humans, we normally wouldn’t want to feel inferior or less able compared to others. This is of course, thanks to our logical, most of the time selfish and sometimes unreasonable, hard to please ego or pride.
So, we avoid people who tend to bring about these ‘feelings’ and say, “I just don’t like her.”, “There’s something about him that pisses me off.”
Needless to elaborate, this negative emotion separates potential best friends to become strangers to each other. It feeds on our pride that we are better off without that person. And tells us it’s because there’s something wrong with him or her. Jealousy makes sure that no relationship will grow out of both parties, thus, NO IMPACT, NO GROWTH.
Where did it all start?
“Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?” – Genesis 3:1
“The man said, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me from the tree, and I ate.” Then the LORD God said to the woman, “What is this you have done?” And the woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.” – Genesis 3:12-13
The serpent used Eve’s emotions (a delight, good for food) and crawled its way to feeding on her curiosity (your eyes will be opened) and pride (you will be like God). And then when God confronted them, they passed the bucket to one another and started pointing fingers.
Result: GAP between man and woman, GAP between man and his work. And ultimately, GAP between God and His masterpiece – you and me.
How then can God be pleased when there’s a gap?
What to do?
1. Be Masters of Your Emotions
Writing from experience, I once avoided a girl who was close to Sean (my fiancee) before we met. I avoided her because I know (women’s intuition) that this girl likes Sean. She’s committed to the Lord, pretty, spontaneous, etc. I never admitted it to myself but because God asked me to write about jealousy, I have to admit this to you that I was, in fact, jealous. (covers face! @Sean.. sshhh)
But God being Sovereign, Perfect and delightfully, a Gentleman, orchestrated an event for us (me and this girl) to sing together. In this event, I got to know her better, enjoyed her company and there, became friends. 🙂 I have been impacted by her servant heart, blessed by her devotions and more.
2. Be Proactive
Know and remember that the people in your life are there for a purpose. And if you don’t know it, then focus on this one thing – IT’S ALL ABOUT GOD. Not your feelings, not your thoughts. GOD. So glorify Him and please Him even by just being kind. Start a conversation. Offer her your seat at the lunch table. Let him cue first before you.
You will be surprised how God will bless your obedience.
3. Remember who you are
You are a child, friend, ambassador of the King of Kings! Step up to who you truly are supposed to be.
Jealousy kills opportunities to be a friend and to please God.
Don’t let it happen.