Confessions of a Complaining Woman

In more than one occasion, I have verbally informed Sean how I felt that I was second priority to his work. By God’s grace, Sean is the man I would soon marry. The best man God ordained in my life to be my lifetime partner. And because of His faithfulness, He blessed Sean with a wonderful business as an SEO specialist. He started this business and continues to be a steward of it only because of God’s almighty hand and goodness.

Webmaster’s Note: This is a post by my Fiancee – Angelyn Co. The contents of which are close to our hearts as we learn to love each other along the way to our wedding day.

Sean and I live in opposite directions from Metro Manila. I am from the Northern part, Quezon City and he, from the South, Las Pinas. It was always a thrill to meet him, a moment I look forward to from the time I start my day up to the time I finish my work. Many times, we would meet more than twice a week because of his client meetings and sales calls in the North. But you see, because of our proximity, a lot of things can happen. To name a few: traffic, cancelled meetings, overtime, and fatigue. And many times, because of one or all of these combined, the scheduled meet-ups would suddenly be cancelled; leaving me very disappointed.

For our upcoming wedding and house planning, appointments are set left and right. I volunteered to do most of the coordination, planning and scheduling of meetings since this is something I had been doing in my line of work so I’m used to it and I’ve also come to enjoy it over time. These added responsibilities were shoulder to shoulder with my responsibilities at my 2 jobs. And to top it off, a lot of brainstorming and adjustments because of my boss’ decision to move into a new warehouse.

Sean would be very nice and appreciative of all my efforts. I especially thought that he would be extra appreciative by coming to our meetings on time or early since we had it set for at least 5 days up to a month before the set date and time with suppliers.  But no, he was busy.

Recently also, Sean moved into a new office. This was a decision that he made in spite of the losses to be incurred from the previous office rent. He has decided. It was done. This of course meant more expenses. And our wedding was only 7 months away with down payments and reservation fees draining our savings.

One day, while on the way to our appointment with a toilet fixture supplier, (set 3 weeks before) I voiced out my disappointment and/or frustration of his being late. I also told him what I thought about this; that he did not value the wedding/getting married as much as I did. I told him how I felt I was not a priority. He was silent. He looked hurt and refused to talk. This made me more upset.

Finally, God convicted me that I am Sean’s helpmate. I was supposed to be his partner not some complaining woman on the passenger seat. God reminded me about a woman of gentle and quiet spirit. “[Wives] Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” – 1 Peter 3:3-4

It was not about who was right or who was wrong. It was about what was pleasing to God and His design for a man-woman relationship. It was also helpful to have read the book Love and Respect where I learned about men’s desire to work and achieve. I easily understood this because Sean loved to talk about his work. And when he does, there was life and energy in his voice. I am continuously learning to pray for and support his decisions whether I agree, understand it or not. He is my leader and I am accountable to God to be submissive to Him.

“Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.” – 1 Peter 3: 1-2.

I am continuously learning that Sean loves to work but it doesn’t mean he loves me less. In fact it means that he has found pleasure in fulfilling his role to be my future provider. After praying, he apologized to me at the car for again being late. He also explained to me that he needed to work hard in order to be able to provide for ALL the suppliers we booked. He found it more necessary to make money first before meeting suppliers since this was the only way they can be our suppliers anyway.

I am truly grateful and thankful to God for such a wonderful man in my life. How about you ladies, have you thanked God and your man today for his desire to work for you and the family?