People are relational beings. We have friends here and there, we have family members and relatives in a lot of places. We have our best friend, our close friend, our tight friend – you name it. We even have pets with whom we believe we have a relationship with. Some relationships can last long – yes it can last a lifetime. Still some relationships end up closing doors.
This entry has been inspired by a very good friend of mine with whom I have gained wisdom with and have grown together in Christ with – to you I dedicate this entry.
Closed doors will be closed doors but God is God
This post is also inspired by my relationship with a very special person with whom I have learned with and gained wisdom in Christ with.
Oftentimes we are faced with major decisions we have to make with the relationships we have in our lives. A really close and tightly woven relationship can make things ultimately joyful or dreadfully devastating for us. Relationships in our lives make out a big part of us. And those relationships always come to a point wherein you have to make a choice.
When push comes to shove and a really close relationship starts to falter and break
There will come a point in time where the tides of our humanity will push us to misunderstandings, emotional instability, arguments and disagreements and what have you. We all make mistakes and sooner or later we will disappoint. Even the closest woven relationships are not exempt from this – all relationships must go through hard times.
And then it all boils down to a choice. “Will I choose the relationship over what has happened?”, “Will I overlook the offense?”, “Will I step back and let it cool off?”, “Will I choose to end the relationship and close the door?”
There isn’t always a happy ending
Our mentality of a happy ending is a never-ending, ultimately joyful relationship. But sometimes that relationship is just not what God had planned for you. If God takes away a relationship in your life do not view it as a failure in your part – because that is how we often view it. Look at it in God’s perspective.
Because God didn’t want that relationship for you, in His eyes, it is a success.
And if He wants you to learn from it and to see if you’re going to make the right decisions about what has happened then He will be the one to give the relationship back to you if He so desires. God is God.
When doors are being closed and you’re left outside
I’m a very relational person. I love talking with other people – sharing stories and insights. I love to communicate. And sure, I make friends here and there but I’ve also had my share of being left outside a closed door.
Just lately one of my dearest friends told me that he/she was closing his/her doors for me. It was emotionally devastating for me. And I had to go through a time wherein I so desperately held on to God. I asked so many questions like: “Lord, why did this happen?”, “Lord why did you allow us to meet in the first place?”, “Lord will it ever go back to the way it was?” “Lord…” And the questions went on and on.
My quiet time more than doubled lately. I sought God desperately and talked with Him all the time. It was a very intimate time between me and God and slowly but surely, I got His answer: “Continue to love unconditionally.”
See, I had two choices. One, take the pride road – I could’ve thought of all my accomplishments and blessings and about who I am and who I’m going to be. I could’ve focused on the closed door and the rejection and told myself “I don’t need this anyway. I hope that this person sees the mistake he/she has done in leaving me out and closing the door for me.” Right there and then I knew that if I made this choice and walked on this road, our relationship would end and there would be no room even for friendship.
My second choice was to follow what God told me. “Love unconditionally.” It is extremely hard especially when my emotions betray me. If the first choice would kill the relationship, this one will take a HUGE amount of humility – being already rejected and knowing the doors are closed for me. I followed the choice that would glorify my God. And what He told me amazed me.
Yes, there are locks but God has all the keys
Yes there are locks but God holds all the keys.
“Closed doors will be closed doors. But God is God.” That’s what I told a friend who is going through, I believe, the most relationally devastating time in his life. Closed doors can only be just that – closed doors. Don’t make it any bigger than your faith in God. I believe that even if doors are closed on us in relationships, God can open it up in His time and in His ways.
We are merely stewards of the ‘duplicate’ keys that He’s lent us. In the end, God holds all the keys. I sought God and the questions in my mind became fewer and fewer. I decided to just trust in Him – He planned it all out. That closed door was ordained by God even before time began. It doesn’t mean it’ll stay closed forever. I still hope in my relationship with that person – that someday he/she will open it up again for me.
“The king’s heart is in the hand of the LORD; he directs it like a watercourse wherever he pleases.” –Proverbs 21:1
God can change hearts. God can open doors. Trust in Him completely.
God is God. Don’t make Him any less than He is. Lord of Heaven and Earth. The heavens declare His majesty. “I am the Lord your God.” He says. Believe it. Don’t fear about closed doors. Fear God and put your complete trust in Him.
In your eyes, closed doors may be failures but in God’s eyes it may well be success – success that the relationship has stopped there because it isn’t meant to go any further under His sovereign will. And that’s just one of the millions of possible reasons. We can never really understand God especially in the aspect of relationships – but that’s where real trust and faith in Him is put to the test.
I choose to trust God.
wow man. ayos ito! 😀 sean pede irepost sa fb?
at the end of the day, God is still God. 😀 hooray!!! Hallelujah!
Of course Joel =)
Please do repost. I'd be more than happy for you to do so and share it with your network.
well said my shoti sean. . . you are right to say it isn't GOD's will to begin with. . . GOD is still GOD and HE is in control no matter what. take care. . praying for you =)
Yep it 'might' not be God's will to begin with. I'm not stomping on conclusions yet. As I've said – God is still God.
Thanks atchi
Hello kuya Sean! I've been following your blog entries occasionally whenever they pop up randomly at my news feeds hehe, this is a really great blogsite you got here, and the entries here are really inspiring,
Amen to the pain we all go through when we're faced with losing those somebodies dear to us, but amen to those who continue to love unconditionally despite being faced with the fact that…they don't want to give their time anymore, and amen to the fact that…whatever happens, God is still working in our lives because He's got the best plans for what's to come.
Keep up the blogs! God bless and good day to you!
Hey Cedric!
Oh hey thanks! Praise God for the wisdom and inspiration 🙂
Amen! Glad you got something out of this entry!
Thanks! God bless you too!
thanks for the insightful comforting and encouragement.
Very well stated. “In His Time He Makes ALL Things Beautiful”
hey. im 20 years old and I feel in love for the first time. He was a christian boy, so I thought nothing could go wrong. For the past two days, all I could do was cry 🙁 I just read this article and I feel so much better about my situation. I will trust in God, and let Him take care of this. I know I didn’t deserve being dumped through texting, being deceived but it happened. Some day I hope it all makes sense and I plan to tell this kid that what he did was wrong but I have forgiven him. Thank you.
Hey Liz,
I’m really sorry for your hurt. I hope and pray that God would help you as you overcome this chapter of your life. I’m glad you made the better choice Liz 🙂 don’t give your heart away again until you’re sure it’s the right person and time. Keep holding on to God.
Thanks for this. 🙂 The 2nd choice is really the best thing to do though it’s extremely hard, doing it for God’s glory makes me happy and it also helps in developing extreme trust in God. 🙂
Hey Pauline,
Yeah it is extremely hard. And yes it does help you develop an extreme amount of faith in God. In times like these in your life, you have almost no other person to hold on to.
sometimes the battle between wanting the best for the both of you and wanting that relationship now keeps on attacking.. but by God’s grace and by making a decision to trust Him and His best plan for us makes everything great.
btw,i love your blogs. thanks for writing about stuffs like this. 🙂
Hey Pauline,
I understand what you mean. And yes, praise God that by His grace and Spirit, we can accomplish things that are humanly impossible.
Thank you for your encouraging words Pauline. I really appreciate it 🙂
God bless you
Wow reading this is amazing. My girlfriend broke up with me 2 weeks ago, I know its something God has taken away from me, for me to come back to him and praise God even after 2 weeks my heart feels its healing day by day. I know I love her and deep down I know she loves me, we both 20 and I do believe if its part of his plan he will open the door for me again but to do so i must let go completely and trust in the lord with all my heart. If not I will still always praise him with all my heart and soul. God has called me to do so much for him when before that I was a lazy and a selfish person. Now My heart is on fire for him. It still hurts me specially at night when I sleep. I wake up every night at 5am cause I still love and miss her. I Never of thought about serving God. Everyday I can’t stop thinking about serving him. It exciting and awesome. I’m reading this book called A MAN AFTER GODS OWN HEART Its truly breathe taking. The other day as I was praying I really felt God telling me to Get over her and I’m in the process of doing so. But he also said that we will cross again in the future but I must really completely let her go now. God is great I will trust in him what ever the outcome is. Praise God.
Jason, whatever happened with her??
how’s you and your friend now? has your friendship been restored yet?
Hey Louise,
By the grace of God she is now my fiance 🙂 and yes our friendship has been restored and more!
Thank you very much for your reply and your new article of “How to be more Patient” Love is patient…. This encourage me a lot, I am suffering with my good friend closing the door for me., and I choice the 2rd way to Love my close friend unconditionally, because “Give up” is not from God’s will, but this isn’t an easy way. I have been crying a lot and a lot and I have just cried to the Lord and asked him to show me any evident that I should continue to love my friend and this is your will. I really want to give up, I lost my hope and I don’t see any point I should continue to Love my friend. Then I saw your article and replied. These mean a lot to me, God listened my cry and pray. Thank you very much for oil to make me keep going.
The article was inspiring to me. when I read the article tears came down my eyes because I finally find hope what I was looking for. there was someone that came into my life, he brought me joy, laughter . we had everything in common and we even pray together he was and inspired friend. we only knew each other only for three weeks and was in the process of getting to know one another. all of sudden things began to drain down the hill. I thought this person that I trust was able to communicate with me. My life felt devastated and started to question God why did he came into my life or why did this had to happen to me. I believe God send me to the right source in finding this article. I realize that God has everything under control when his time is right for me. This article has been inspiring and uplifting.
I’m currently in the same situation right now. After our first big fight, my love one stopped responding to me. It’s been 2 months now and almost every night I wet my pillows with my tears but this heartbreaking event only brought me closer to God. I keep on praying and reading the word of God for guidance, healing and for spiritual growth and one thing that always pops out to me is for me to wait and to love unconditionally. It’s really hard because oftentimes I think it’s already hopeless and that I should just accept my defeat and turn my back on him but I know God is in control of everything. I’m not rushing for us to be romantically linked again but for a friendship to bloom first and proceed from there. I still hope and pray that God would give me patience and strength in this difficult time.
I always inspire others but this day I am deeply trouble in my relationship. Upon all efforts to restore our relationship went into the dustbin .
I am so so depressed and above all confused.
Just as I bind myself up and prayed to God and reading your blog and others on why sometimes some doors are closed, I feel strong to move on and trust God in everything that comes on my way no matter how hard I tried.
God bless u Admin
Dear Sean,
Thank you for building more trust in God and His will in my life. I am going through hard time and I have surrendered my problem to Jesus. But often I become faithless but this article increased my faith and I fully trust what ever will happen is the will of Jesus. This incident in my life brought me more closer to Jesus.
I lost my ex a while ago. 7 months ago now 8, Thank u for posting this artical on closed doors. Honestly I do truly still miss her, she was my smile everyday. I’ve been in love with her for 4 years. Its really hard to except the fact that she may never come back into my life. I’ve already prayed and told god i will follow whatever is his plan.
It’s always difficult when you’re in the midst of things. It can only get better.